Soaps By Remote

Blogiversary

Today this blog is 3 years old.

Happy birthday blog.

Honestly, it feels like longer. 

I originally started the blog because I had started to get back into the soaps after a hiatus and didn't have time (and, in many cases, the fan-girl sensibility) to hang out on boards and chat about all the nutty goings on on the shows. That's still the case.  In fact the starting of the blog ironically coincided with me taking on a major new role at work that involved a lot more work and travel.  Which does interfere with soap watching from time to time, but also makes me appreciate coming home to curl up on the couch with the soaps and blog away.

There were a few other soap blogs around in July 2006, but absolutely nothing compared to the number there are now, which is such a cool thing.  I love this soap blog/site community that's grown up in the last few years and continues to grow and feed itself and build a soap community within the soap community.  It's supportive of the genre, it's generally pretty smart, and it keeps me in touch with what's going on on all the shows I might not be watching so that if there's something good I'm missing out on, I know to check it out.

Or, as with the moment, it gives me the hint that steering clear, even when I'm tempted, is still the best way to go. 

See, General Hospital has been doing a few things that make me think that perhaps it could be on an upswing.  More Alexis, getting back into great casting with Michael and Kristina, having Michael get back involved with the Quartermaines, ending the post-partum story with Robin, Martha Byrne, not actually killing Ric or turning him into a serial killer even if his send-off was virtually non-existent, remembering to throw in things like little uncomfortable scenes between Jason, Elizabeth, Lucky and Jake.  All of that sounds good.  But just as I know all of that from the blog-o-verse, I also know that there's still mob crap, not one but two pregnant women falling down the stairs, Sonny impregnating someone else, some rewritten history giving Luke another kid, Emily having a long-lost badly acting twin, and that Dante is about to maybe, finally, make an appearance.  But, more importantly than all of those negatives, and despite the potential of all of the good stuff above, it seems that everyone still watching is bored to tears.  And it was boredom that had me cease watching in the first place.

So I won't be tuning back in right now.  Thanks soap blogoverse.

On with year four.

Come on Days, pull a Y&R

 So, Crystal Chappell is returning to Days as Dr Carly Katerina Von Leuschner Manning.

My first response is, of course, a big yay! for Days bringing back one of the best actresses in daytime.  And a character I liked.  And breaking their no one over 40 rule.  

My second response is déjà vu, going back to this post.  Not that you need to be bothered reading that post, because essentially what is was about was a few questions on Y&R bringing back Tricia Cast as Nina.  I was concerned that Nina was no longer – at the time her return was announced – much tied to the canvas due to the rampant retconning that had taken place during her absence, and therefore what was the point of her return unless they were about to undo some or all of those retcons?

The answer, fabulously, was “all”.  Jill is once again not Katherine’s daughter, Cane is not Jill’s son, and Nina and Phillip Chancellor IV are suddenly tied right back to the canvas.  All without the need to bring back Cricket.

With Days bringing back Carly I have some similar questions.  Of all the people she was involved with, the only one really still around is Bo.  Now, sure, that’s the most important one, and Carly was involved with both Peter Reckell’s and Robert Kelker-Kelly’s versions of Bo, so there’s not a complete detachment there.  But what about everyone else?  There’s no best friend Jennifer, there’s no brother Frankie, there’s no Shawn-Douglas, there are no Alamains whatsoever, not even not-quite-sorta Alamain John.  

So, does Days just bring Carly back with some lame/non-existent/a la Adrienne off screen explanation for where Lawrence and Nicholas are and throw her straight into an, admittedly potentially fabulous, triangle with Bo and Hope?  Or do they take a leaf out of Y&R’s book and use her return to do some fabulous things with the people she was involved with back in the day?  Like, we could only hope, Louise Sorel’s Vivian Alamain.  Or bringing on someone as Nicky who can mix it with the younger set who, after all, he’s connected with but not at all related to.

And one assumes that Crystal Chappell’s real life hubby Michael “Lawrence Alamain” Sabatino is coming back to LA with her. Of course, it’s just a pity that Steve isn’t around anymore, given that Lawrence is the one who was actually responsible for faking his death…  But that’s the stuff of about five other posts.

So, Days, great casting coup, but now let’s really see if you can step up to the plate and create something that will make me tune back in.

On a semi-related, small soap world note, I’m also thrilled to see that Lynn “Lucy Coe” Herring has joined the As the World Turns cast.  Obviously, it’s not a show I watch, but anything getting her back on the air, not to mention in some way reunited with Jon “Kevin Collins” Lindstrom, is a great thing.  And related to this post as little Nicky Alamain was of course responsible for off-ing Lynn Herring’s Days character, Lizette Whatsherface, when Herring took a brief early 90s break from GH.  Which she thankfully rapidly went back too.  Otherwise we would never have had Sigmund the Duck, which would have been a huge shame.  Oh dear, now that’s got me remembering the days when GH had several pets as featured characters.  That were far more entertaining than many of the characters they have now. Sigh.

Death by .....?

I'm back from my unintended but lengthening hiatus with a little poll.  The not at all unexpected news that Rick Hearst is leaving General Hospital has now been released and of course ABC has promised that Ric Lansing's write-off will be exciting etc, etc.

We all know what that means though, don't we?

So, yes, it's almost certain that of course he'll die (because no one leaves this show any other way), and chances are it will be heroic Jason offing him for some noble cause during a music-laden montage of violence (because that's just what happens on this show). 

The only question for me, therefore, is the set-up.  What do you think?

poll by twiigs.com

I'm getting dizzy again

So, Soap Digest is reporting the following turns of the casting roundabout:

GH:  Rick Hearst and Megan Ward to recurring

Y&R:  Nia Peeples out, Jess Walton staying

OLTL:  Kathy Brier and Michael Stack going

Add to that the news that Tricia Cast is returning “full time” to Y&R, and all the rumours swirling about the other potential cast drops at GH, not to mention the previous mass exodus of over 40s at Days, and I’m finding it hard to keep up.

Let’s start at Y&R.  It would appear from all the leaks and gossip floating around in the last few days that Jess Walton and the powers that be reached an impasse in negotiations which led to a walk-out and a casting call for the role.  Obviously someone eventually blinked.  I do a lot of these negotiations from the producer’s side of things in my day (and night, and weekend) job, and in my experience there’s usually a little blinking on each side and things wind up in the middle.  Regardless of what happened, I’m very pleased to see Walton continuing on as Jill.

The departure of Nia Peeples is hardly a surprise.  When I returned to watching the show recently I registered exactly the following in relation to her character: “Huh, it’s that girl from Fame”, “Neil got married again?”, “Snore”. 

As for the return of Tricia Cast, that can only be a good thing, but does have me scratching my head a little.  I was watching when Nina first joined the show, and I already knew Tricia Cast as the girl who had accused Ted Capwell of rape on

Santa Barbara. As I recall Nina was one of those fabulously evolving characters who went from trouble-making little bitch to heroine over time.  My concern is where she’ll fit into the canvas now.  Her original peer group no longer exists on the show and there’s been no real replacement of them age-wise, so it’s really just Victoria with whom she has peer group history, and her family ties to Jill and Katherine have been severed by a retcon and a deSORASing.  Which is not to say that she doesn’t still have great emotional ties, and with that whole family being thrown up in the air and tossed around again, there’s no doubt room for story.  But aside from the potential for some great talky scenes, actual story to drive those scenes isn’t immediately suggesting itself to me.  But perhaps I spent too long away from the show.   

Moving on to OLTL, I’m a little torn on this.  I really like Marcie – and Kathy Brier – but I can see they’re not doing a lot with her other than waiting for the baby-switch to play out.  I also gather that this departure may not have been a one-way decision.  And if she goes then obviously there’s no necessity for Michael Stack to stay around as the bland but inoffensive Michael, notwithstanding all the bad news he’s been delivering lately.  Also, the cast at OLTL is huge at the moment, and getting bigger this week, so some further culling is obviously in order.  So this isn’t exactly a massive shock, though I’ll be even more interested to see how the resolution of the baby-switch plays out now.

Then there’s GH.  Which continues to be absolutely incomprehensible to me on virtually every single front.  I certainly can’t watch it at the moment.  To harp on a point I have harped on many times around here; GH for me has been for years the land of missed opportunities and unfulfilled potential.  On the small stuff and on the big stuff.  And the decisions about Rick Hearst and Megan Ward (and any other similar decisions that have been mooted in recent weeks) are perfect examples of GH’s ability pile missed opportunities on unfulfilled potential and then multiply them exponentially. 

Let’s start with Megan Ward.  Obviously this has been coming for some time, since they gutted her character easily a year ago.  Kate started out, like so many things at GH, with so much promise.  And for a period there she delivered.  Sure, she was a movie rip-off, but she was a different kind of character for the show and in the early days she made Sonny interesting, and challenged him, as opposed to every other woman in his life this decade.  She also had great chemistry with Jax and could have had with any number of other people.  But sure enough, she was left in Sonny’s orbit slightly to long and became a Sonny-apologising wet blanket, and boring as hell.  And then Sarah Brown showed up, and it was only a matter of time as to when Kate would cease to have any relevance whatsoever.  The final two nails in her coffin being the complete and utter fouling up of whatever the hell they had ‘planned’ for Dante – the extent of which was obviously just Guza yelling into the writers’ room “hey, Sonny needs another kid!” - and the reuniting of Carly and Jax.  So GH takes an interesting, strong, female (gee, is that just a coincidence?) character played by a really good actress with a solid prime time career behind her, and in less than two years renders her so useless and boring that I couldn’t really care that she’s been moved to recurring.  Except, of course, for all those missed opportunities and all that wasted potential.

Last but definitely not least, we have Rick Hearst (ha, accidently typed his name as “Heart” on the first attempt).  Who, by all reports, just signed a new contract and is now bumped.  This is a multi-Emmy winning (and deservedly so, which can’t be said of everyone) actor, who has managed to roll with every single personality transplant they have given his character over the years and still make it work, and who has absolutely smoking chemistry with one of the powers that be’s designated leading ladies, and they’re bumping him to recurring?  Who can do drama and comedy and be a villain and a romantic lead, often all at once?  Who has links all over the canvas no matter how badly his character his been treated (by the writers)?  Who looks really hot in a sweater?  Recurring?  Really?

Times are tough, budgets are tight?  That's when you ditch the chaff and write for this guy, not when you bump him to recurring.

On the upside, of course, is that Hearst is a big soap name and I think could walk into, or walk back into, any other show and steal it away in a heartbeat.  Which I hope he does. 

Run, Rick.  Don’t walk, run.

“Prize” Fight

There were many pretenders to the title, but when it came down to it, was there ever any doubt that these two would wind up duking it out in the final?  

So, without further ado, let’s ring the bell on the gold medal round and see who finally comes out with the much sort after Title:  Soap’s Most Fertile (with the bonus title Least Capable of Using Birth Control thrown in).

In the red corner, hailing from Bensonhurst via Port Charles New York, Mr Michael “Sonny Boy” Corinthos Jnr.!

And in the blue corner, long time resident of Genoa City Wisconsin, but prone to wandering, the one and only Victor “The Moustache” Newman!

Now men, let’s keep it clean and below the belt.

Ding, ding, ding: Round One!

The combatants dance around each other for a while, Newman seems at home in the ring, while Sonny Boy appears a bit at sea without his weapon of choice – a glass – in hand.  

Eventually The Moustache throws the first punch:

- four adult(ish) children causing trouble in Genoa City right now!

Corinthos hits back:

- four children of my own, three of them ripe for SORASing!

Newman lands a blow that sends Corinthos staggering:

- yeah but one’s adopted AND comatose, and you don’t even know about the oldest one!

Round One to The Moustache.

Ding, ding, ding: Round Two!

Newman: a miscarriage, an abortion, and a pregnant wife killed in a car accident!

Corinthos: ha! A miscarriage, a still birth and a pregnant wife blown up in a car bomb meant for me!

Round Two to Corinthos.

Ding, ding, ding: Round Three!

Newman: I’ve impregnated two women since my most recent vasectomy, and all the others since my first!

Corinthos: A truly virile man would never have a vasectomy, let alone two!

Newman: My daughter was born because her mother stole my sperm and got herself inseminated (and another woman tried)!

Corinthos: Man, no woman wants the turkey baster when she could have me!

Round Three to Newman, just.

Ding, ding, ding: Round Four!

Newman: I didn’t know one of my kids was mine for years, and another was deliberately raised without me.

Corinthos: are you kidding me?  Two of my kids were hidden from me for their own safety, I lost custody of the other two and I still don’t know the oldest one even exists!

Newman: I’ve won all but one Who’s the Daddy? I’ve been involved with!

Corinthos:  I knocked up a mother and daughter, when the mother is smart enough to know better, and I won a Who’s the Daddy? in knocking up the daughter!

Round Four to Corinthos.

Ding, ding, ding: Round Five!

Corinthos: I just slept with my marriage of convenience wife, so you know what’s happening next…

Newman: I just knocked up my 50-something girlfriend!

Round Five to Newman.

And that brings us to the end of a hard fought battle, with neither contestant giving an inch.  Just when it looked that one was ready to stagger and fall, he’d fight back, and no knock-out blow was landed.  And so we go to the judge’s for a points decision, and the Winner is…

Victor Newman!

It was the knocking up the same woman over three different decades that put him over the top, but he should keep one eye over his shoulder, after all, he’s got a few years on Corinthos who’ll no doubt be working hard to best Newman when the championship battle next comes around.

Go ahead, look smug Mr Newman:

It's Not Even a Wonderful Alternate Universe

So, does GH plan on alternating gimmicks forever?

Giant stunt, It’s a Wonderful Life-lite, giant stunt, It’s a Wonderful Life-lite?

As you may have been able to tell from the lack of coverage, GH’s non-sweeps stunt was unable to hold my attention.  At all.  I did decide to tune in for the one-off “What happened if Maxie died instead of BJ?” episode this week though.

Now, sure, one thing GH appears to have realised is that focusing these episodes around people like Robin and Maxie is a good idea – though, given they’re clearly going to do this again, and again, it screams out for a “What happened if Jason didn’t hit his head on a rock?” episode, which is likely to be equally interesting and depressing – even with the focus on Maxie this episode didn’t really work.  At all.  

In fact, it sucked.

First, that wig was awful.

Second, the commentary from Maxie was unnecessary.

Third, why does every single one of these things have to involve Carly playing pool at Jake’s?  And why is she involved with Patrick in most of them?  What kind of cruel Patrick-Carly fetish does Guza have exactly?

Fourth, Robin talking to Maxie’s grave in the way she did made no sense whatsoever.

Fifth, as nice as it is to see Bobbie, why did Jackie Zeman add even further to the ravages she has apparently wrought on her body by dying her hair non-red?

Sixth, why the hell was BJ, (for all intents and purposes) product of Tony and Bobbie’s marriage which in this alternate universe was still fucked up by Carly, such an insufferable goody-goody?

Seventh, Johnny as mob boss hitting on BJ was just a silly unnecessary attempt to link things in with the ongoing story (and I don’t even mind the idea of Maxie and Johnny).

Eighth, the V8/Campbells placements were as clunky here  as everywhere else on ABC over this last couple of weeks.  I understand and appreciate the cause, but it still clunks all over the place.

Ninth, Spinelli the mob lackey being all depressed and snarky because he was doing the exact same job as he’s doing in normal universe GH, but not doing it for super hero Jason, was utterly laughable.

Tenth, as much as she rocks, I never want to look at Kristen Storms’ arms at this angle again:

And, keep in mind, this episode included many characters that I like.  Which is quite the indictment.  

On the plus side, Johnny as mob boss hitting up Lulu as Kelly’s waitress to start stripping at the Paradise Lounge was pretty hilarious.  Apparently someone both remembers the past and has a sense of humour in relation to Sonny, miraculously enough.

I suspect the same person was responsible for having Bobbie fired from the Hospital in the closing montage.  Making a quiet point.

I also do pretty much have to love the way that even in her dreams Maxie figures she's responsible for making Patrick and Robin and Lulu happy, as if she actually had anything to do with any of it.  Maxie is selfish and self-centered, but well intentioned, and that's the way we like her after all.

And sure, we got to see a lot of the appropriate vets.  Except, you know, dead Tony, and absent Felicia, and dead Alan, and dead Georgie.  And banished Lucas.

Apparently I’m bitter today.

Next on General Hospital:

- the long-ignored vampire population of Port Charles corners all the residents on a cruise liner docked in town during the Yellow & Green Charity Gala, causing the ship to crash into the Quartermaine Mansion causing it to burn down and killing a Quartermaine;

- Carly sleeps with Sonny and thinks she’s pregnant.  Again;

- Jax has a dream in which Sonny got arrested and thrown in jail for feeding drugs to Karen Wexler and the world is a much better place, though in the alternate present of his dream Carly is inexplicably married to Patrick and hitting on other guys while playing pool at Jake’s.

Where is the train?

It's hardly news that General Hospital hasn't had an original idea in at least five years, but the news that they are burning down/blowing up the Hospital as part of this year's non-sweeps Stunt is bringing that lack of originality to a new level of hilarity to me.

So much that it's causing me to have a window into the writer's room and be moved to replicate the diagram currently on their story planning white board:

I do note, however, that the person writing the Robin has post partum depression story clearly lives on the other side of the country in a nice, interesting place and has never been contaminated by the stupidity going on in the rest of the show.

Addicted to Clock

It must be A Stunt (though apparently the powers that be haven’t caught up with the news that sweeps was put off until March) because:

(a) Carly is mentioning that she was wrong in keeping Michael away from the Quartermaines;

(b) someone is having an actual party…in a storm;

(c) a Quartermaine is in peril;

(d) I’ve detected a few accurate mentions of relevant history; and

(e) there’s a clock.

Otherwise, who the hell could tell?

Carly hasn’t even got her fishing line out and ready for emergency surgery yet.

Come on GH, I tuned in for a promised Stunt.  A patented Stunt.  Instead we’ve had one establishing hospital scene, a couple of utterly non-specific aftermath “conversations” with Patrick and Special Agent Braid-y, and three whole episodes that have no tension or interest beyond a normal episode.  Which is to say: not much of either.

Which makes me wonder why on earth they felt the need to use their old countdown clock again.  Don’t they realise it’s CGI and not going to get rusty if they stick it in the digital storeroom for a few years?

It’s so pointless to date.  I was a fan of the Metro Court hostage crisis.  It got me back into the show after a couple of months of malaise.  I wasn’t such a fan of the Black & White Ball, but it did at least keep me involved right from the beginning by including pretty dresses, boys in tuxedos and a slap fight between Elizabeth and Sam to start things off.

As for this?  Hurumph.

Now, leaving aside the fact that the Stunt is really only a “stunt” and I don’t care much about a lot of the other goings on, I do have a few comments about the last three episodes of GH:

- Jason toying with turning Sonny into the FBI makes him finally, officially Sonny’s girlfriend.  Please, please, please let them have him wear a wire.  Sorry, a WIRE!!!!  Please?

- I think they should continue the flirtation between Liz and Matt.  And I say this as a Jason-Liz fan who has long figured that their time would never come.  They did ditch them in favour of Jason-Courtney after all; they’re never going to happen.  My only hesitation about it is another triangle involving Liz and Maxie.

- A rivalry between Nikolas and Jax would have made sense two or three years ago.  One now, in these stupid circumstances, does not.

- Maxie trying to make Jason sit down on the couch: hee!

- Also, “Go away and take your cheesy lines with you!”

- Is Embecca going to be wearing that annoying beret throughout?

- Oh God, Spinelli, really?  Jason’s funds are untainted?  Blurgh.  Glad Johnny Z isn't so lobotomized by living with Lulu that he can't recognise that for the crap it is.

- Matt is completely growing on me.  Yes, it has to do with him being part of the one truly watchable section of the canvas.  “Bro.  Sis.”

- Love Patrick and Robin discussing Matt and Maxie.  Love them all the time, and I quite like the Robin post-natal depression story so far.  I choose to ignore that all the sweet stuff in Monday’s episode came in the form of an anvil.  If you can’t build any tension towards the Stunt, powers that be, I can take sweet, understanding conversations for only that and not as a heavy piece of iron to the head.

- Maxie:  “But why? – never mind, I lie all the time.”

- Ric: “Everyone figured out you’re not anyone’s hero?”

- Stop teasing me with Ric and Claudia and just have them get it on again.

- They just played this Sam story 4 weeks ago, right?  Please tell me this version isn’t going to involve a bikini, a hot tub and Anthony Zacchara.

So, my summary of the latest GH Stunt to date is:

Maxie: 2

Matt: 1

Robin and Patrick: 3

Ric: 1

Jax: -2

Stunt and everyone else: 0

The last time they did one of these I had a large scale body count going on by this point.  And they haven’t even touched the cheesy CGI.  Really, what kind of a Stunt is this?

Soaped Up

Today I find myself in a unusual situation.  It’s mid-weekend and I am completely caught up on my soap watching.  

For months now, I have been continually behind.  Well, I had felt as if I were continually behind mainly because I just couldn’t summon up the energy to watch the stacks of episodes of General Hospital and Days – and even One Life to Live briefly while Tess was running rampage on a daily basis – I had sitting around.  However, late last year I came to realise that while my life – work, travel, life – did provide some hold ups, especially with OLTL pre-New Year, really it was the shows that were to blame.  

If they don’t compel me to sit up late at night to catch up then they’re not doing their job.

Things have now changed. 

I have dumped Days.  I keep in touch with what’s going on in general terms to see if there’s something I want to watch, and so far, there’s nothing (aside from catching the odd sex scene on You Tube for amusement value).

I have entered into a more casual relationship with GH, where I’m only tuning in for things that interest me, meaning I’m only tuning in very periodically and generally only for things Scorpio-Drake with a side of Scorpio-Jones.  And yes, I’ll give The Latest Stunt a look because (a) they do often do these things well just to spite us; (b) if it’s no good at least it will be good for a laugh; and (c) they’ll probably kill off a Quartermaine, so I should pay attention to that at least so I can rant accordingly.

Both of those I regard as positive-negative moves.  Positive for me, because the shows are so negative.

On the positive-positive side of things, having started out watching less than a year ago as an experiment, I now find myself coming home on a daily basis wanting to watch OLTL right away. 

And, with my time a little better balanced I now also have the opportunity to act on all the good word I’ve been hearing for the last few months and start watching The Young and the Restless again.  I am not fully settled back in yet – and a lot has changed since I last quit watching, but more on that in a dedicated post momentarily – but so far what I have seen is pretty damn good.  And with that I also want to see what happens next and as soon as possible.

So it turns out that it’s far easier than I had been making it out to keep up with the soaps; break-up with the crap and hook-up with the good stuff.

Maybe some Worst

Okay, so I haven't entirely given up on the best and worsts of 2008, largely because there was some pretty bad crap going on.  So, let's take a poll:

poll by twiigs.com