Soaps By Remote

Blogiversary

Today this blog is 3 years old.

Happy birthday blog.

Honestly, it feels like longer. 

I originally started the blog because I had started to get back into the soaps after a hiatus and didn't have time (and, in many cases, the fan-girl sensibility) to hang out on boards and chat about all the nutty goings on on the shows. That's still the case.  In fact the starting of the blog ironically coincided with me taking on a major new role at work that involved a lot more work and travel.  Which does interfere with soap watching from time to time, but also makes me appreciate coming home to curl up on the couch with the soaps and blog away.

There were a few other soap blogs around in July 2006, but absolutely nothing compared to the number there are now, which is such a cool thing.  I love this soap blog/site community that's grown up in the last few years and continues to grow and feed itself and build a soap community within the soap community.  It's supportive of the genre, it's generally pretty smart, and it keeps me in touch with what's going on on all the shows I might not be watching so that if there's something good I'm missing out on, I know to check it out.

Or, as with the moment, it gives me the hint that steering clear, even when I'm tempted, is still the best way to go. 

See, General Hospital has been doing a few things that make me think that perhaps it could be on an upswing.  More Alexis, getting back into great casting with Michael and Kristina, having Michael get back involved with the Quartermaines, ending the post-partum story with Robin, Martha Byrne, not actually killing Ric or turning him into a serial killer even if his send-off was virtually non-existent, remembering to throw in things like little uncomfortable scenes between Jason, Elizabeth, Lucky and Jake.  All of that sounds good.  But just as I know all of that from the blog-o-verse, I also know that there's still mob crap, not one but two pregnant women falling down the stairs, Sonny impregnating someone else, some rewritten history giving Luke another kid, Emily having a long-lost badly acting twin, and that Dante is about to maybe, finally, make an appearance.  But, more importantly than all of those negatives, and despite the potential of all of the good stuff above, it seems that everyone still watching is bored to tears.  And it was boredom that had me cease watching in the first place.

So I won't be tuning back in right now.  Thanks soap blogoverse.

On with year four.

OLTL Catch-up Week 10

Week 10

Aka the Week of the Crying and the Hugging

- Michael and Marcie decide to renew their vows, twisting that knife even further

- Starr and Cole are reunited with Hope, Marcie offers Starr a locket of Hope’s hair even though Hope doesn’t presently have any hair.  There are some disturbingly nice scenes between Blair and Todd before Todd seeks to take the kids home with him

- Rachel tests Nora on her feelings for Bo and Clint, Bo tries to convince John to come back to the force, Clint tries to convince Nora to set a date. Bo and John’s discussion reminds me that disappointingly we haven’t seen Bo and Rex talking in a while

- Brody starts to help Jessica through her feelings about losing the baby, Charlie tries to help Viki with the same by proposing

- Gigi’s hair is no longer so nice, the nice again, but I continue to enjoy watching Gigi and Schuyler. “Was she stripping in a convent?”

- Marty puts the moves on John, Viki and Tea bond some more.  Todd takes his ‘goons’ to bust Naked Lady out of the hospital, so she can help him keep the kids from Blair, meanwhile McPain lays out some honesty to Blair over their marriage and I am a bit disappointed, I’ll admit. Not with the honesty, just with the outcome. John then rolls straight over to see Marty, while Blair goes to see Todd and get the raw end of the pentagon.  I vote for Blair getting a whole new guy

- Starr changes her mind about giving up Hope, while Natalie fesses to Marcie and Michael about how long she knew about the baby-switch. Marcie overhears Langston and Markko discussing how Starr and Cole wanting to keep the baby having already suspected as much herself, meanwhile they decide that making out is the best remedy for that

- Marty talks Cole into attending graduation, Markko’s mother keeps reminding everyone that his name is actually Heraldo Rivera, Markko gives a speech that motivates Marcie into giving back the baby, and the boys graduate (well, sort of, in Cole’s case), and Marty and John make it in time to see it and it’s actually kind of sweet

- The too-be-married couples get together – “Look Clint, a ring!” – and predictably establish they’re all getting married on the same day, which further rubs Dorian’s face in her singledom after Ray leaves.  She then proceeds to start seeing kissing couples everywhere at the graduation party (which I don’t know why she’s hosting given Langston and Starr don’t graduate until next year).  Also, I know I haven’t been watching very long, but shouldn’t Dorian know who Rachel is without being introduced by Shaun?

- The custody battle goes back to court, Todd subpoenas Marty to testify not knowing she has a vested interest in having Blair get the kids back, and then he calls a surprise witness

People who cry this week: Viki, Charlie, Jessica, Brody, Starr, Marty, Cole, Blair, Marcie, Michael, more from Blair, Dorian, more from Jessica, more from Starr, Natalie, more from Marcie.

Rating for the Week: 4 out of 5

OLTL Catch-up Weeks 8 and 9

Week Eight

- Todd waits for news of Tea in the hospital, Blair comes to visit, Todd again makes the baby being dead or alive all about him, until Blair informs him of the kidnapping on top of the kidnapping on top of the baby-switch. They then lay some civil, nay, friendly groundwork between Todd and Blair

- Next it’s John and Marty’s turn. And with the actual smiling and inappropriate making-out there was a bit more more-than-friends chemistry there than I’ve seen previously, but still not enough for me. I still think that Blair and John, and Todd and Tea, and Blair and Tea, and, as wrong as I know it is, Todd and Marty, work better chemistry-wise that Todd and Blair, and John and Marty

- Schuyler comes to visit Gigi and I hit the verge of being able to watch some part of this story.  Especially when Gigi is calling Stacey a complete whack-job (literally).  Gigi and Schuyler are very easy to watch, I think it’s the combination of Scott Clifton, the characters suddenly ceasing their recent stupidity, and Gigi having hope and sarcasm instead of desperation, which plays much more to Farah Fath’s strengths.  Unfortunately for Rex, the Stacey-Rex-Kyle-Pimp Dude part of the story remains unwatchable.  But if Rex is going to be that dumb, he deserves everything he gets

- I reflect on the fact that it’s actually quite un-soapy that Natalie and Jared anticipated all the trouble (partly of their own making, of course) and got married the night before the wedding was scheduled.  In normal soap world this would have been another obstacle to that

- Bess proves less than adept at delivering clunky exposition, Mirror Tess starts to appear and is now, apparently, the rational one, while Brody gets a earful of the possibilities of Jessica’s DID

- They remember that Brody and Charlie were in AA together for half a second

- It comes time for baby-switch obfuscating and revealing. The obfuscation task falls to Blair for Starr, Marty for Cole, and John for Marcie and Michael.  Of course that part is easy for Silent John; he just doesn’t say anything at all for several scenes while Marcie and Michael cluelessly theorise.  Eventually they break the news and the Manning, Thornhart and McBain clans sit down to wait together.  The nice thing with all of this is that the adults, despite all their own turmoil, are acting like adults.  Blair, Todd and Marty are a united front for the kids, and Todd may roll his eyes at Marcie, but he keeps his mouth shut

- Bess goes to see Nash’s parents, who apparently didn’t know that Nash is dead.  Fortunately Nash’s father happens to turn on the TV at exactly the moment Viki is making her plea for information about the missing pair, unfortunately both Brennan’s turn out to be supremely gullible.  Meanwhile Brody heads out looking for Jessica and thanks to some locational faux-backs has no trouble figuring out where Bess has gone

- Cristian moves in with Layla.  I don’t expect to see them again for another few weeks.

- Todd: “Why is it when John goes all vigilante he’s a hero and when I do it I’m a jerk?” Ha!   

Rating for the Week: 4.5 out of 5.

Week Nine

June!  I’m up to June!

- Brody does not for a second buy Bess as Jess, which is about how long we believed Tess as Jess last year. Of course it’s somewhat predictable that Nash’s parents have a shotgun, a vase and understandable misunderstanding in their arsenal of interference.  That brings Jessica out and confuses the hell out of the Brennans

- Cole goes to talk to Rachel about his conflicting emotions about Hope’s return, and everyone else starts contemplating the realities of Hope being alive for her multiple parents. Dorian, of course, blames Viki for the baby-switch

- Viki, Clint, Clint’s hat, Bo, Charlie, Jared, Natalie and the rain all arrive at Brennan central to confront Bessica.  And take-over the Brennan’s house.  There is then an odd juxtaposition of Bo waiting for the SWAT team while the rest of the family hangs casually around the living room that said SWAT team would likely want to storm

- The ABC promo department undermines itself and annoys me by telling us in a strap on Tuesday’s episode that Starr and Hope will be reunited the following Monday.  And then again on Thursday’s episode…

- Viki plays Jean Randolph in an attempt to break through Bess, Clint continues to feel impotent, Natalie blames herself, and through this they bond. Jessica finally remembers what happened and works through it with Viki, and I think Bree Williamson did a much, much better job than she did with Nash’s death last year.  Erika Slezak’s dynamite performance goes without saying

- Gigi’s hair is looking good

- Lord, Brody has lovely blue eyes

- Mo and Noelle appear.  Had almost forgotten they existed.  Their job here is apparently to serve up food and insensitivity.  Shaun asks Rachel out, Destiny offers to help Matthew with his math

- Officer “Moraso Fiasco” Fish moves in with Layla and Cristian, creating a whole new spin on the three’s company idea, and an ad and how-to for digital conversion

- Todd shows up to make amends with Marcie and Michael in his unique Todd way, John and Marty bond some more, the Buchanans say goodbye to Chloe, Starr verges on deciding to keep the baby, and I may tear up a little when Jessica and Viki give the baby to Blair and Todd.  Jessica cries in Brody’s arms and I come close to forgiving Bree Williamson for last year’s over-the-top hysterics

Rating for the Week: 4.25 out of 5.  It only doesn't rank as highly as the previous week because of all the exposition partly necessary and partly unnecessary in having Jessica remember the baby-switch.

OLTL Catch-up Week 7

Week Seven

- Marty remembers the rape and then everything else with coaching from Todd, while Tea gets disappointingly hysterical, Blair takes charge, and John continues to talk to himself

- Starr and Cole spring Kyle at Todd’s, while Natalie and Jared spring Brody at Llanfair, which gives Rebecca the chance to kidnap Hope

- Tea and Blair have a gas-induced heart-to-heart, Jack gives John a few clues but not enough to avoiding getting hit over the head, and the stories crash into each other as Rebecca hands Hope to Powell so he can talk endlessly at Todd and Marty while Jessica goes into a panic upon discovering the baby missing

- John eventually saves the day. Of course.  Tea doesn’t quite spill the beans about her big secret, there’s an explosion and a building collapse (stakes, you are officially up)

- Natalie and Jared finally tell the truth about the baby switch while Jessica begins to remember and Brody tries to help her through it.  When Viki and Clint begin to realise which baby the real Chloe was traded for, I get chills

- I get them again in the hospital when major eye contact happens between Todd, Marty and then Viki, who figures out why the baby was kidnapped.  Todd then makes it all about him and in a sign that, again, this show isn’t GH, Marty and Viki immediately make fun of his god complex

- Separately, Hope’s four parents find out that Hope isn’t the baby that was buried, and Starr is immediately on to all the inconsistencies in the late Dr Joplin’s story as an explanation . Of course that’s nothing compared to how freaked out Starr and Cole become when Todd and Marty say that the four of them need to sit down and have a chat

- Random spectacles sit around the hospital for no reason

- Jess/Tess/Bess takes off with the baby and the random spectacles that sit around the hospital for no reason.  Brody is the only one who can bring Jess out which is reasonable given how hot, cute and sweet he is, but Bess takes over again

- Location, location, location

- The redemption of Kyle begins, Marty and Cole get reacquainted, Marty and Blair have a few great grandmother bonding moments, Tea isn’t doing so well, and McPain gets a hug

Rating for the week: 4.5 out of 5.  This is how you do sweeps.  Often the less I have to say about episodes the better they are.  Too caught up to comment.  Too good to make fun of.  Also, Todd and Marty still have too much chemistry to ever make me comfortable.

OLTL Catch-up: Week 6

Week Six

- Bo and Nora discuss their near-kiss, hug it out and get caught by Clint who is sick of being on the outer, but honest about it, and Bo is honest in return. “I thought you wanted the truth.” “That doesn’t mean I have to like it!” “You should have thought of that before you started dating my ex-wife.” Then Charlie gets in on the jealousy act.

- Langston and Dorian have a really good conversation about sex, which doesn’t stop Dorian from toying mercilessly with Markko, who himself starts the Condom Follies Relay, passing the baton to Dorian, who in turn passes it on to stab-happy Lola

- Poor Jack finds Todd, Blair and Tea passed out, thinks they’re all dead and then has to have a conversation with himself which is super awkward, before proving he can make a crack about McPain in any circumstances and isn’t at all stupid

- And it’s bucks and hens time. To which Natalie decided to wear a prom dress circa 1992:

which winds up being her wedding dress when she and Jared are married by John Hudson in front of no witnesses.  Much like most the pre-wedding parties had no witnesses in this house because of the Morasco Fiasco turning into the Stripper Fiasco at both events

- Prom!  Baby Exhumation!  Wholly inappropriate prom entertainment! All on the same night!  And despite exhumation taking place the same night as the dance, Starr and Cole at the Prom look happy for possibly the first time since I have been watching this show, i.e. over a year

- Langston’s dress is fabulous from the front, but when she turns around one wonders why she felt the need to accessorise with a pink apron worn backwards. Maybe she was afraid of sitting in something

- Clint over-compensates for his jealousy and the general crappiness of their relationship by proposing to Nora, but another honest conversation follows, then another proposal

- Loony Powell recreates the dorm room where Marty was raped and fesses up to the murder spree with his justification being trying to make everything up to Marty.  Because stabbing the guy sleeping next to her in the bed won't traumatise her at all.  He has people trussed, tied and straight-jacketed. This, naturally, results in hallucinations, head-butting, taunting and bargaining. At least they actually referenced Houdini

- As promised by some lovely people in the comments, high as a kite Lola is truly hilarious. She also fesses up to the murder we’ve known for some time that she committed

- I believe Ray plays the guitar, but even my decades long love for A Martinez isn’t getting me to watch that.  Dorian tries her best to blend into the armchair so he’ll forget she’s there and stop playing:

But when the chameleon thing doesn’t work to stop the guitar, sex does.  Or, as Lola would put it: sex, sex, sex, sex, sex (floaty movement)(flounce), sex

- Speaking of which, Lola and Markko are so adorably nervous and giddy and sweet and romantic and finally get down to business but I am a little distracted that (a) they used that song GH used for Jason and Elizabeth; and (b) that I know that’s the song they used for Jason and Elizabeth (weaknesses showing)

- Rebecca, for some reason, opens the door of Todd’s house where she’s holding the boys hostage.  Lucky it’s her baby-switch-secret-knowing brother at the door

- Marty remembers the rape, and Tea and Blair make an ill-advised(ish) break for it

- John, appropriately, wears a black t-shirt as he goes on his rescue mission (see my upcoming dissertation: The Silent Stare-Hero Complex Paradigm: Jason Morgan and John McBain, A Comparative Study)

- Blah, blah Morasco Fiasco, still not watching

Rating for the Week: 3.75 out of 5.  The serial killer story started to come to a head, there was lots of romance and plenty of sex, but the structure was suffering a bit from cramming too much into a two “day” period, with what should have been more cliff-hanger-y stories getting left aside for a couple of episodes and making the week feel a bit disjointed.